Boundaries for Your Soul

boundaries-with-guilt

Why you should pay attention to guilt

By Alison Cook | May 29, 2019

Do you feel guilty all the time? If you do, please know you’re not alone. A constant sense of guilt is one of the most common challenging emotions I come across in people. Sometimes guilt is a subtle feeling—a nagging sense of all the things you’ve done wrong. Sometimes it’s not so subtle—a sense of...

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4 steps to befriending your anger

By Alison Cook | April 30, 2019

The other night I felt angry. I noticed it deep within, way down at gut level. It welled up within me, and it was all I could do to hold it in. And I took notice. Because it took me years to understand the importance of listening to anger. Instead, I used to bury it....

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fun therapy with Mike Foster

Alison Cook on Fun Therapy with Mike Foster

By Alison Cook | April 24, 2019

Check out this episode of the Fun Therapy podcast, where I talk with the wonderful Mike Foster about emotions, boundaries, safe people, curiosity, and the lost art of listening well. I love what Mike is doing over at Fun Therapy and was so happy to be a part of it! You can listen to my...

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joy

The importance of play

By Alison Cook | April 3, 2019

I planned to write about weariness today. And honestly, all I want to do is go outside and play. It might be because the hope of spring is finally descending on us here in New England. (There’s a reason we have Tom Brady, guys. Have you spent a winter in New England? We need *something*...

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9 ways to set boundaries with loneliness

By Alison Cook | March 27, 2019

It takes a long time to make an old friend. I learned that the hard way in the first 2 decades of my adult life. Job changes, moves, graduate school, and my family of origin leaving the small, close-knit town of my youth left me struggling with loneliness as I navigated into adulthood. We need...

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What if loneliness was a gift?

By Alison Cook | March 21, 2019

Loneliness gets a bad rap. And for good reason. One of our deepest, most basic human needs is to experience healthy attachment—or in non-psychological terms, to experience loving connection with someone who sees us. When you stop numbing, one of the first painful emotions you may encounter is loneliness. And loneliness is a double-whammy. It often...

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7 vulnerable feelings that surface when you stop numbing

By Alison Cook | March 13, 2019

As you peel back the layers of numbing behaviors, you might notice new feelings that surface—vulnerable feelings that may be uncomfortable or unpleasant. There’s a reason we numb. Don’t be alarmed. Those painful feelings are presenting themselves for healing. Look at these feelings as an opportunity to take a You-Turn and gain insight into your...

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bench in winter

A note to all our numbing pain avoiders

By Alison Cook | March 7, 2019

As Lent arrives, I see you, my impulsive, sometimes sneaky, pleasure seeking little numbing sidekick. But here’s the thing my dear, young, “I want what I want when I want it” self. God wants more for you. He really does. And I’m not just saying that because I’m supposed to. You see, I’ve encountered the...

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Taking A Uturn Info Graphic

4 steps to turn your daydreaming into reality making

By Alison Cook | February 21, 2019

As a kid, I used to create complex daydreams all the time – in vivid detail. I would dream about my future, where I lived, even what I’d be wearing and the fabulous 80’s hairstyles I’d take with me into my imagined future. 🤫 Back then, this make-believe world I created was soothing – it...

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4 questions to ask when it comes to setting boundaries with your phone

By Alison Cook | January 29, 2019

Imagine a day without your phone. . . Does a quick hit of Instagram make the grocery store line bearable? Are you texting your friends more than you’re talking to them? If you’re panicked at the thought of a day without your phone, it might be time to set some boundaries with your internal phone...

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Boundaries with a numbing entertainment junkie

By Alison Cook | January 22, 2019

This one hurts. I’ll admit it – entertainment is probably my #1 numbing behavior and always has been. Whether it was Friday night sitcoms in the 80’s, Rom-Coms in the 90’s, or the binge-worthy internet surge of the 2000’s, I’m a sucker for escaping into the real or not-so-real lives of other people. So this...

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When you’re eating to numb, find the part of your soul in need of your care

By Alison Cook | January 17, 2019

I don’t want to face the pain. That’s rarely what we’re thinking when we’re mindlessly eating to numb. At least, that’s not my experience when I reach for that bag of chips or third cookie. Instead, what I notice is a sense of urgency. I really need that cookie. Grab it, fast! Some part of...

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